For quite some time now, there is a culture that has cropped up, or that started cropping up in Uganda, whereby for a man to sustain a love relationship, you must heavily invest in it, especially in terms of finances. This has given birth to a new term in the Ugandan Lingua which has been coined to mean

TRANSPORT MONEY

“Transport Money” can be loosely defined as the money a man gives to a woman in order for her to come and visit him, especially if that visit is going to involve sexual intercourse. In other words, if a woman is to visit her lover, the first condition is that as a man, you must send her money for transport so that she can come, otherwise, if you fail to do so, then she will not appear.

“Transport money “ comes in another form where if by God’s grace a woman uses her own money to come to a guy’s place, then after the visit, and after all the “activities” have been done, then the man is expected to give her money to transport her back to her place. So either way, a man has to pay to see his own lover!!!

“Transport Money” depends on the financial status and class of the people involved in a love affair. For example, if a couple is not well off, a guy will send about 10k or 20k to his lover as transport, plus withdraw charges of course. For middle-income couples, a guy will order an Uber to transport his lover and for well-off couples, a guy will buy a return air ticket for her to fly from maybe South Africa, Ghana, Kenya, or Spain to come over and see him, but all In all, the goal is the same.

In the unfortunate event that a man fails to send his lover money for transport, then the visit is impossible because the woman will say, “Oh baby, I would want to come over but I don’t have transport.” The next step after this will depend on how desperate a man is, to “have it.” There is also an unwritten law here in Uganda whereby most women believe that for a man to call you for a visit to his place, then he needs you for sex. I don’t know how this came about, but somewhere, somehow, it is believed by almost everyone. Or is it because some men use the phrase “Come and visit me” as a polite way of asking for “some!!”

I took the trouble to interview a number of girls and women and also listen to the views coming in from the public via radio, TV, and social media on the issue of whether or not women should be given money as a condition for visiting their loved ones, and the answers are as funny as they are, shocking!

Many women argue that any man who loves his woman would be able to provide for almost all her needs and also be present in her life.  Otherwise, if you can’t send Transport fare, which is the minimum requirement in love, then according to women, you don’t love them.

Other women argue that since in most cases, when a man calls his girlfriend to his place, then he wants “some” and so women see men as the chief beneficiaries of this visit, the ones who need it most and so they must incur the transport costs of their visitors.

Some women said that at times, when their boyfriends call them, they genuinely have no money on them to go and so they need some help from the guy. ..Of course, this is a lie and a lame excuse, to say the least.

All the above responses have evoked serious questions from the Boy Child. For instance, if two people are truly in love, why would a lady ask for transport as a condition for visiting her own lover? Isn’t this ridiculous?

Secondly, sending a woman money for transport doesn’t automatically mean that the guy loves the girl, as most women would want us to forcefully believe. Some men send it as a catalyst to speed up the process of the girl’s arrival because apparently, a girl who has received money moves very fast and acts quickly on her decisions.

This desperate need for money among women is evident in their social media posts, their WhatsApp status updates, etc. where they ridicule broke men, calling them all sorts of names and as a result, the boy child is placed between a rock and a very hard place. One, you need to send the girl money for her to be content, as if this is not enough, you must be extremely loyal to her. At times these two don’t mix, finding a rich guy who is also loyal to his girlfriend at the same time, doesn’t come by easily.

I personally strongly believe that sending a girl money for her to come and see you or giving her money after visiting you is exactly the same as Prostitution, but this time, in another form.

The Oxford English Advanced learners Dictionary defines a “Prostitute” as a person who has sex in exchange for money. Prostitutes are found on the streets and money is given to them in order to have sex with them. This is exactly the same as when a woman hides behind “Transport Money” as an indirect way of charging her boyfriend for giving him sex.

Girls who ask for transport money are similar to Prostitutes because in both cases, there is the exchange of money before a guy can see or touch the lady. Therefore by asking for transport money, a girl is indirectly saying that “Pay me before we can proceed.” The most hurting point is that even girls who are in stable relationships still ask their loved ones for transport fare!!!

Many men had gotten used to sending money but this trend took an ugly twist when some women would refuse to show up and would switch off their phones immediately after receiving the money. Now this one hurts a lot. So, men have to suffer twice, you look for the money and send it, but you also have to keep praying that she comes, otherwise it is not a sure deal.

After all this, men have now devised a new trick, Transport is paid for when the girl has arrived at your place.  If she doesn’t come, then you have saved your money, but if she comes, then well and good, you pay. For some strange reason, many women are strongly against this idea, they want to have the money in their hands because, in this way, they can save something. She asks you for 20K for a Journey which costs about 5k and she saves 15K. Should you refuse to send her the money, then you risk being called stingy, etc. Very strange!!

 

By Vincent Sserunkuma

A Professional teacher and Writer.

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